Me, just after waking up. I know you are sooo attracted to me right now!

Ever since I moved to Ireland, my hair has been less than cooperative. Gone are the soft, touchable locks of my LA days; here my hair is unmanageable and constantly tangled.

The reason is the hard water that is prevalent throughout Ireland. According to this map, I live in an area with “moderately hard” water (I can just imagine those poor folk who live in the “hard” areas!). For pipes this means lime scale buildup. For hair, it means disaster. The water here makes my hair very sticky, and by that I don’t mean sticky like honey or melted marshmallows. The best way to explain it is by comparing it to spaghetti. When you first drain cooked spaghetti, it’s loose and easy to toss with a fork. But if you let it sit in a bowl for five minutes or more, it starts sticking together. If you stick a fork in it, you’ll get clumps of spaghetti instead of nice, individual strands. My hair = five-minute old spaghetti. Fork = my hairbrush.

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No matter how much conditioner or what kind of expensive shampoo I use, my hair remains as if I’d washed it with a bar of soap. Though I manage to make it look presentable most of time – a lot of work, believe me –  the mornings are a whole different story. Back in LA, I could wake up with nearly perfect hair. Here, I wake up with a head of hair that would make Robert Smith of the Cure cry with envy. Every morning I get out of bed wondering what odd form my hair will reveal in the mirror…I liken it to watching clouds take strange and curious shapes. “Is it a dog? No, it’s a castle with two towers! Wait, it’s Jedward!” This morning my tresses resembled a salad made of lint and dead grass. I was careful not to step out onto my balcony in fear a passing bird might make a cozy home on top of my head.

Very messy but delicious breakfast scramble. And no, I do not own any other plates…yet!

The hot mess that is my hair inspired my everything-but-the-kitchen-sink breakfast this morning. Using leftover asparagus, bell peppers, onions, cheese, deli meat and an egg, I made a scramble that wasn’t pretty to look at but tasted absolutely fantastic.

Like they say, looks aren’t everything!